Schools planning active parenting workshop

To help parents strike the right balance between dictator and pushover, the Lebanon Special School District Family Resource Center will hold an active parenting workshop called "Doormat or Dictator" designed to help parents with discipline issues.
The workshop will be Tuesday and Oct. 30 in a new daytime format from 11:15 a.m. until 1:15 p.m.
FRC Director Beth Petty said the workshop will help parents discover what kind of disciplinary style they are using and what works best.
Petty said parents should ask themselves if they are a doormat who lets their child manipulate them when they are trying to discipline, or are they a dictator who loses control of their emotions when they discipline?
"The active parent works with the child, respectfully, yet firmly, to avoid battles and get desired results," Petty said. "Dictator parents demand cooperation, doormat parents hope for it, while active parents earn it."
Petty said she was definitely a dictator before viewing the video-based curriculum.
"It is really eye opening, and a little embarrassing to see yourself portrayed on a large screen. The videos show a wrong way to discipline, then follow up with a better way to handle each problem. Every parent who attends ends up laughing at themselves," she said. "Some say they are classic case dictators, like I was. Some say they are doormats. Some say they are both, depending on the situation. After the first few scenarios, everyone relaxes and realizes we are all there for the same reason — to be better parents."
Petty said participating parents will learn how giving children choices empowers both the parent and child, how mutual respect diffuses power struggles, who owns a problem — the child or parent, how to avoid communication blocks and why reward and punishment often backfire. Parents will learn about polite requests, "I" messages, logical and natural consequences, either/or choices, when/then choices, the four goals of child behavior and how to encourage the child.
The workshop is free and includes lunch and childcare as well.
The workshop will be at Castle Heights Elementary School library. Anyone in Wilson County or surrounding counties is encouraged to attend. For more information, contact Petty, or RSVP for the event at 615-453-2693, text 615-804-2460 or e-mail pettyb@k12tn.net.
Staff writer Mary Hinds may be reached at 615-444-3952, ext. 45 or maryhinds@lebanondemocrat.com.